Feelings are one of those things that people either seem to be very in tune with or very distanced from. For those of you who are not in touch with your feelings or just don’t care, I promise you, this is really important stuff, so you’ll want to pay attention.
Feelings are the reason we do everything we do.
Remember the motivational triad from Day 18? We move towards what feels good and move away from what feels bad.
Everything that we desire in life is because of what we think we’ll feel once we get it. We want the relationship or the job or the house or the car or the trip or the clothes not for the things themselves, but for the feelings we believe we’ll have once we get those things.
It’s important to distinguish between a feeling and a sensation.
A sensation is involuntary and starts in our body, such as the sensation of cold or hunger.
A feeling, or emotion, is a vibration we experience in our body, but it starts in our head.
Feelings are NOT caused by what is happening in the world around us.
Feelings are caused by our own thoughts.
Two people can experience the exact same circumstance and have two completely different feelings because of what is happening in each of their brains.
Think about the weight goal you have for this month. Ask yourself why you want it. Then go deeper and ask what your really want. Now ask yourself how you will feel when you get it. You’ll find that it’s really this feeling that you’re after.
For example, let’s say you wanted to lose five pounds this month. Let’s say the reason is that you wanted to look good in a summer dress or a particular bathing suit. What is the feeling you’re after? Is it to feel attractive? Desired? Worthy?
Here’s the great news. You don’t need to fit in that dress or bathing suit in order to feel those things. You can feel those emotions right at this very moment. They are totally available to you right now. Your circumstance doesn’t have to change. Only your thoughts do.
And here’s the crazy part. The moment your thoughts change to generate that feeling you really want, your ability to reach that original goal will become SO MUCH easier. You will essentially guarantee the result just by generating that feeling right now.
Now this doesn’t mean that you should just change all your thinking right away. That’s what we call “thought swapping”. This can work sometimes in some situations, but it’s usually not the first step.
The first step is always awareness. You want to become aware of the thoughts you are already thinking and what they are creating for you now.
Most people are unaware of what they are thinking and feeling most of the time. If you want to change your life, you have to become aware of what you are feeling in the present moment.
Remember, our human brains are wired to avoid pain and discomfort, so much of our behavior is an attempt to change or avoid negative emotions.
What if you were willing to feel anything?
How would your life be different?
Think about every emotion that you spend much of your time avoiding. What if you no longer had to hide from this emotion?
Stress, overwhelm, anxiety, fear, boredom, the list goes on and on.
What if you were willing to feel all of it?
What if you were willing to have the full human experience of all the negative and positive emotions that ever existed?
Can you even imagine how different your life would be?!
Tomorrow I will discuss more about feelings and what to do with the unpleasant, uncomfortable, painful emotions that we as humans experience.
Do you want to become aware of your feelings and the thoughts that create them? Do you want to see how these thought/feeling combinations are creating the results in your life? This is the first step to making any change. Schedule a free call with me to learn how I can help you with this work at the link below.